Take it from me: breakups are rough, especially after 8 years with a person.

At first, you really think the problem is you. They’re distant, disinterested, even slow to come home, and you can’t help but blame yourself. Maybe if I was more excited to see them, you think, they’d try harder. You don’t want to believe things are ending. But they are.

Sure, you’ve had your share of some rough spots in the past, some real screaming matches. They’ve even threatened to leave you before, but have always come back. But somehow, somehow you know this time is different.

They’re on the phone all night with their friend, you know the one, the bad influence. They’re saying really hurtful things, stupid things that people say about one another when the end is near, things you say when you want out. You try to make excuses to your friends about them, and most of them are supportive (except for that one who loves to point out how she knew it all along, but she’s got relationship issues of her own.)

When things get really bad, you hate them, and no one would blame you. You want them out of your life as soon as possible. They’re bringing everyone down, they’re ruining your summer. You hate their hair, you hate their clothes. You can’t stand the sight of them.

But then, then you remember the good times, the high fives and the way they really came through for you back in 2004, and you want to forget that, that somehow would make it less painful, but you can’t.

Because, in the end, even after they shack up with some loser rebound who you can’t understand, you wouldn’t be who you are if they hadn’t been in your life, on your side. And, after some time passes, you’ll be able to look them in the eye again, you’ll be able to smile together at the reunions, and it won’t be so bad, after all.

It’s not you, Manny. It’s us.

UPDATE: I wrote this last night, when the Ramirez-Marlins deal seemed imminent. Now, not so much. Still, much rings true, and I know he doesn’t mean to say the things he does when he’s been drinkin’, and I still love him so much. Maybe we should try counseling?

UPDATE #2: So he ends up with some blonde LA floozy. Typical man.